Heartbreak and lies, how to get over a player

He was such a jerk! He lied to you, used you, and left you hanging out to dry. When you get played, it can be really painful. It is even worse when you have sincere feelings for the guy who played you. So, how do you get over a player? How do you get over a player when you aren’t even mad that they played you because at least you had a chance? When you still like the guy who played you, and you can’t just hate him, what can you do to get over him?

Acknowledge. It is not fun when you still like someone who played you. It is even worse when you just can’t hate them enough to get over them. But what you can do is love yourself enough. You have to face the fact. He played you. He does not like you. He did not choose you because he was attracted to you, and there is no hope for a real relationship. The things he said were lies. He said what you wanted to hear so he could get what he wants to get. So, you have to recognize and acknowledge that to him you were a number, an item to cross off a list. So, this is not a reflection on you, but him, and that you still have hope for a successful relationship, but not with him. He won’t change, and you can’t change him. This is fact. This is something you NEED to acknowledge. Quit lying to yourself so that you will feel better. Fact the facts.

Don’t let it happen again. Shame on him for fooling you once (or playing you once), but shame on you if it happens again. You know now, so don’t go back to him. It does not matter what he says, he has said it all before and look what happened. So, now you are in the driver’s seat, you know what happens when you go for him, and that puts you in power, it is now your choice to get played or not. So, don’t. If you do your heart will not heal as quickly, the cut will be deep, and you will lose a lot of your confidence.

Get rid of stuff, do not reminisce. When someone plays you, they tell you want you want to hear. Playing someone is a manipulation. So, you probably have songs he dedicated to you, poems he sent, instant message conversations saved, notes kept, messages recorded, etc. To get over him and heal after the heartbreak and lies, you have to get rid of the notes, the complimentary conversations, the letters, emails, texts, etc. Even if it made you feel great, you need to get rid of it. It is those little compliments, poems, emails, and texts that are what got him into your heart in the first place. To get over it, you have to get rid of them. Toss them, don’t just store them away. You might even want to burn them, it can be very therapeutic. Wash anything that smells like him, and give away, donate to a thrift shop, etc. anything he bought for you or gave you. Reminders do not make it easy to get over someone, especially someone who broke your heart and gave your confidence a blow because they played you.

Do not try and talk to them about it. If you try and talk to them about it, you present a new challenge. You become a target to get played again. Also, you do yourself a huge disfavor by dwelling on something outside of your control. So, you know they played you, you know they lied, and guess what, they know it too, but part of being a player is never admitting you play the girls you play. So, they aren’t going to tell you they were using you, they will tell you that they really did like you, things just did not work out, blah, blah, blah.and guess what, you get hope where hope should not be, and you get heartbroken again instead of better. You do not need the ultimatum end from him, you should set it yourself.