Getting more Involved in the Extra-Curricular

girl playing soccerExtra-curricular activities usually are activities which are available as some kind of supplement to your education.  These activities are usually voluntary, and you usually aren’t paid for participating in them.  But, they are a great way to meet new friends, serve in leadership positions, and have fun!  Being involved in extra-curricular activities also looks really good on resumes and college applications.  Plus, studies have been done which show that students who are involved in extra-curricular activities often get higher grades than students who are not involved in extra-curricular activities.  So, you should get involved!
Getting involved in extra-curricular activities is a lot of fun and exciting!  But, getting involved can also be a little overwhelming if you don’t know where to start.  If you want to participate in extra-curricular activities and clubs, but don’t know how to start getting involved, there are a couple things that you need to know!
First of all, think about what kind of career, physical, creative, political, and social interests you have.  Then, see what kinds of activities are offered after school.  Many schools offer different kinds of clubs or activities that you can do.  If you’re worried about getting home after your extra-curricular activity, see if there is a school bus which leaves your school later.  Many schools offer activity buses so that students can participate in all of the programs that are offered.
The next thing that you will want to consider after looking at extra-curricular activities is time.  Do you have enough time to dedicate to the group?  If you are looking at serving in a leadership position in the group, will you have enough time to do a good job in that role?  For example, if you are an athletic person, you could consider joining one of the school athletic teams.  These teams often practice before and/or after school, and sometimes there are athletic meets or events on the weekends.  If you’re thinking about joining one of the school teams, make sure that you can give the team the time commitment that it needs.  If you slack off in your team responsibilities, it could not only affect you, but it could hurt the whole team!
Another thing that you’ll want to consider when looking at extra-curricular activities is money.  Although a lot of clubs and activities are free, sometimes there could be money that is involved.  For example, if you are involved in an athletic team, you might also be required to travel to athletic events and compete, and sometimes schools don’t fund the travel expenses.  If money is something that you need to consider, talk to you the school and coaches of the team before joining.
Besides athletics, there are also a lot of different clubs and other extra-curricular programs that you can get involved in!  If you like to write, you might consider joining a journalism club or a creative writing club.  If your school has a newspaper or a yearbook, you might like to get involved in writing for one of those groups!  You could also joining some of the other clubs, like creative writing club, current events club, debate club, Model United Nations, earth science club, foreign language club, or student council.
If you ever feel like you’re getting stressed out because of your extra-curricular activities, you might want to reconsider getting involved, or perhaps think about joining again later.  Make sure that you can stay on top of your homework and other responsibilities in addition to your extra-curricular work.  If you feel like you’re not able to stay on top of things, you might need to cut back.  Try and plan ahead to stay on top of everything in your life, and your extra-curricular activities will be fun and rewarding for you!

Why won’t he commit to a relationship?

students standing against a wallYou have been dating casually for a while now, and you can’t get him to commit to a relationship. Find out why he won’t commit from a guy’s perspective.

Question: Why won’t he commit to a relationship?

Answer: Honestly, why would he? You are in high school and there are tons of girls. You are in a place with hundreds of girls every single day that you see, spend time with, talk to, etc. Limiting that to one girl seems really restrictive when you are just a teenager.

The truth is that is why you do not see many guys getting married in their teens. They are just not to that point in their life yet. Most guys at this stage are still trying to figure out what they want, what they like, and don’t like about girls, and so saying that you are everything they like, and committing to a serious relationship is a big step. Dating around, and dating a lot, and hanging out with a lot of girls is how they find out what they like. So, trying to get him to commit to something really serious is seen as a restriction not an opportunity.

If you are pushing commitment and a relationship, they will get even less committal. You have to realize, there are a lot of options out there, and their friends are going to tease them about being tied down, and they might see commitment as a restriction and limitation. And, it is. At this stage in his life, he is probably not ready for that. And, if he thinks he is, he is wrong.

You will see some guys committing, but that might be for reasons you do not see. Some guys will commit to a relationship because if they don’t they won’t get any. A relationship often facilitates the ability to have physical desires met. So, if you are wanting him to commit to a relationship, and he is already getting those physical desires met, that is another reason he won’t commit.

So, if you want him to commit, you have to have something that will be different once you are exclusive, other than the fact that he can’t date other girls. This does not mean you should put out more, or do things you are uncomfortable with. However, it does mean that if you are already doing that, your chances of getting him to commit are pretty slim, unless you hold it over his head, and then you won’t be happy anyway.

It is good that he won’t commit. You shouldn’t either. While some high school sweet hearts end up together, most don’t. So, when you don’t end up together you may regret having spent that many years of one of the most fun times of your life tied to one guy. You should be dating a lot, and not looking for something serious, instead you should want to get a feel for what you like, your type, what is out there, and most importantly, how you react in relationships etc. So, put commitment on hold until it matters. Wait until you are in a place that committing to someone will actually mean something and be able to go somewhere, and in high school have fun. Do not hook up with a lot of guys, but date a lot, and get a feel for how you should be treated, and how you shouldn’t be treated.

Thank him if he won’t commit, because it means you can’t, and that is a gift. There is a lot to experience, and a lot of fun to have, so be good friends, and develop your relationship that way, and enjoy being able to date several people.