Can I really be “one of the guys”?

The balance in friendships between teen boys and teen girls can be a difficult one to find. Platonic friendships are not always possible, and often times they leave one person or another in limbo wondering where they stand. This is often the case when it comes to the girl who hangs out with all the boys. Is it really possible for this girl to be “one of the guys?”

The answer is no. Girls and boys are biologically different, so when it comes right down to it, a girl will never really just be one of the guys, however, there are times when she fits in so well she might as well be. The following is a look at how to be “one of the guys” so that you can enjoy your friendship with boys without the hassle of love triangles, etc.:

1. You can’t be interested in any of the guys. You will not be one of the guys if you like one of the guys. If you like one of them it will create a slight tension. Even if it is not evident, or you never say anything, you will not be able to interact with them the same way another guy would, and thus you aren’t truly “one of the guys”. So, if you want to be part of a group of guys, you have to keep feelings under control.

2. The guys can’t be interested in you. If a boy likes you, he is not going to treat you like one of the guys, as that would be frustrating and confusing to him. If he likes you, he wants you to be a girl, and so he would not treat you like a guy, or at least there would be an underlying tension to it.

3. You have to share common interests. The term “one of the guys” is usually applied to the girl who can hold their own in the sport of choice, the activity of choice, or the male conversation. So, if you want to be “one of the guys” you have to be able to hold your own in whatever it is that they are interested in. If they play video games like a champ, you have to be interested in playing video games, and play as well as they do, especially because boys thrive from competition. If you are not competitive, it will not work to be “one of the guys.”

4. You have to be comfortable with them being guys. You will never be one of the guys if they can’t burp, fart, comment on females, and make suggestive comments around you with out you being offended. Guys interact with one another in ways they do not interact with girls. Generally in front of a girl, their more gentlemanly side comes out, they restrain themselves from being overly gassy, and they do not comment on other female’s anatomy when in the company of a female. So, if you are one of the guys you have to put up with that.

5. You can’t expect them to share in your feminine interests. If you want to be one of the guys, you can’t expect the guys to want to play “girl” with you when you are in the mood to shop, primp, or whatever else it is you might do. Those friendships almost have to stay exclusively male in nature in order for them to continue. If you try to include “the guys” in your feminine pursuits, they will get a mixed signal, and you won’t truly be seen as “one of the guys” any longer. So, paint your toes on your own time, and talk boys to other girls, not to the guys.

If you can do this, you have a shot at being “one of the guys”, but do you really want to compartmentalize your life like that?

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