How to get him to talk to you

So all your friends are dating and you have this guy that you really like.  He’s really cute and cool and likes all kinds of things that you like too.  The only problem is that you’re afraid to talk to him!  You’re not sure how to get his attention and you’re way too shy to just walk up to him and ask him on a date.  What would be really great is if he would notice you and start talking to you.  But you get so flustered and nervous when he’s around that usually you just try to be invisible.  What should you do?  How can you get that special boy to notice you?

Well, first of all, you should know that he probably already has noticed you.  If you’ve noticed him around all the time, the chances are pretty high that he has seen you in school with your friends.  Who knows- maybe he even likes you too.  It’s quite likely that he’s too shy to say anything to you too.  So don’t freak out.  Everybody is nervous to talk to girls or boys they like.

Before you decide to try to get him to talk to you, there are a few things you should find out about him.  Most importantly, you should know if he has a girlfriend or not.  If he does, sorry girl, you need to move on.  If he doesn’t, you’re free to continue pursuing.  You should also have a general idea of the kinds of things he likes to do and who his friends are. This will tell you a bit about the kind of person he is and let you know if you really want to date him or not.

So here’s what you need to do.

  1. First, chill out.  Don’t get so stressed out when he’s around.  He’ll notice if you’re always jittery when he’s around and he’ll think you’re weird.  Just be calm.  He’s just a boy.  He’s just a person.  He gets nervous too.
  2. Next, be confident.  Everyone likes people who have good self-esteem and are secure with themselves.  People will notice that you are confident and it will make your personality shine.  Working on your confidence will also help you be less nervous when the boy you like is around.
  3. Third, be yourself!  This might be the most important tip of all.  You must be yourself no matter what.  Don’t let the desire to date some boy change who you are.  If any boy, no matter how cool or hot he is, doesn’t appreciate your personality then he’s not worth dating!
  4. Fourth, flirt with the boy you want to notice you.  But if you’re flirting with him and want him to talk to you, don’t flirt with other boys.  Just him.  If you’re still too nervous to actually talk to him, you can try making eye contact with him in class or smiling at him when you walk by in the hallway.
  5. Make friends with his friends.  If your circle of friends includes the guy you like, it will be much easier for you to get to know him better.  Also, if you (or your friends) are friends with his friends, you can send your girl friends in “under cover” to find out what he thinks about you.  One of your friends can ask one of his friends if he likes you.  He’ll find out that you asked about him and then if he likes you, he’ll work up the courage to talk to you.

So let’s say you’ve followed these steps and he’s actually talked to you.  Now you need to get to know him before you start dating.  It’s important that you build a friendship first so that your relationship with him will be a good one.

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