How to say no to him when he wants sex

girl mad and boyDoes your boyfriend constantly want to have sex and you don’t?  Does he say things like, “But, I love you” or “I want my first time to be with you”? And do you say things like, “If you loved me you would wait” or “I’m just not ready yet, but soon”?  In the beginning he would back off and be understanding, or at least act like he understood. But do you now feel like it is getting more and more difficult to either tell him “no” or when you tell him “no” he thinks that means maybe? Well I have good news and bad news, the bad is he probably won’t ever quit trying until you either break up or give in. And the good news is I maybe able to give you some tips and advice to help you keep your virginity and your boyfriend.
You have probably heard other people, usually adults,  say “If he loves you he will respect your choice not to have sex”. Most of the time when guys are wanting to have sex they are not thinking about respect, they are not thinking about anything but getting you to take your pants off. Yeah, he may be saying how much he does love you and respect you while he is in the “pants off’ process, but he also wouldn’t be able to tell you what two plus two is at that time. Now if he is getting pushy to the point that you feel scared, not just irritated but down right scared, you need to end things with him. Of course, he is sorry, he will tell you over and over. For awhile he will be less pushy but he will cross the line again and again he will be sorry. I know you love him but do you really love someone that scares you like that?
Now if your boyfriend is just always trying to get you to have sex or constantly asking when you will be ready, this is quite normal for guys. I am being honest here, if he didn’t ask, didn’t try, didn’t seem to have the slightest interest in having sex with you, he probably wouldn’t be your boyfriend. You would think something was either wrong with him or something was wrong with you. A little bit of “making out” from time to time is fun, right? I hate it when people say “petting” when they are referring to touching each other, in fact touching each other doesn’t sound much better, but before you reach the “touch” level you need to stop. If you are not ready to have sex, don’t tease him by going to that level. You may want to go to that “touch” level but this seems to only give guys the impression that you do want to have sex and that you are just playing hard to get. Go ahead try to explain you are just not ready, you will hear all the usual stuff, “But I love you” and so on. If you are serious about remaining a virgin and not having a boyfriend is out of the question, my advice is don’t let things get past “making out”. Pretend you have a cramp in your leg, say you heard a noise, tell him you need to get home or he needs to go, say or do whatever it takes to avoid going any further. Don’t let him know that is what you are doing either. How long do I think this is going to work? Hopefully until you go away to college.

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